Caption me

Here is your challenge. Put on your journalist hat and pretend you were given the task of captioning the below picture for your local newspaper. What would you write? Go ahead, poke a little fun or even poke a lot of fun because the true story of this photo is sad and pitiful.

So go ahead and comment.

The real story. We arrived at 9:00 AM with the scouts for the beginning of our scout camp in the high Uinta mountains (10,000 feet). We were told by a scout "leader" (who had not yet graduated from puberty) to grab our trunks and head to the lake for "swim check". Knowing that in no way that I or my fellow leader Josh Carmack, had to swim I still choose to "represent" and "motivate" the boys and jump in the bitterly cold lake.

As my faced surfaced from the frozen abyss 3 feet from the dock, the sound heard around the valley was a mixture of shock, anger and fear, but mostly fear. I was asked to swim to a target not too far off, return, float on my back for 1 minute and tread water for 1 minute. Not a tall challenge for a strapping slightly husky lad as myself, right? Well this moment changed my life forever. Only Josh truly knows how close my kids came to losing their papa bear. There was a moment when the heavens opened and angels guided me to the dock. This is no exageration, I nearly died...as did the power craving dock scout that told me I'd have to start over if I touched the dock...how close you came to a swift death my young scout nazi.

The photo below takes place just seconds after I got back to the dock. After looking at it now for a week I realize that I have never had the expression on my face before. I've come to define my look as "anxiety ridden euphoric hate."

The good part of this story is that this singular event has caused a mighty change in my heart and waist. I've since started the Brittany Spears diet and have lost 5 pounds with another 35 on it's way off. So in a rather peculiar way I can thank the Boy Scouts of America for the hellish kick in the arse that was "Swim Check"